Ladies...this is the 'talent' we are subjected to :(

Ladies...this is the 'talent' we are subjected to' :(

Hello m'darlings,


So yesterday my sister and i thought we'd have a browse through the shaadi.com website...just for laughs (don't be getting no ideas now!) and BOY DID WE HAVE FITS OF LAUGHTER OR WHAT!!!


So let me break it down to you ladies, this is what the UK has for us in terms of their most eligible bachelors...according to shaadi.com of couse. You don't mind if i use a few examples do you?! Of course i will keep the names annonymous and this is purely for humour purposes :) Oh and these are all British born Bangladeshi lads by the way...but i'm sure the same 'type' of guys are prominent in other communities...


1)
i'm very simple. i'm very quite boy. i like read islamic book. i m muslim

A bit too simple i think. I can imagine his wife saying "Shall we go out for dinner?" and him replying "No, it ok i read book". Another lad with similar interests to this guy:

I am not that much outgoing, sorry abt that. i prefer to pass my free time staying home, i dont like too much crowed, i dont want to share my problems with anybody without exception, there are few people who can understand me and my feelings. I like every beautiful creation of God, i fond of beauty. I like healthy music no matter what kind of it. I like driving, chatting, spending good time with family. I dont like watching sports channel all the day, i dont like when people do lie for nothing. The kind of person i am looking for who is pretty, simple, not moody, who is dreamful, funny, can adjust with all situation, thinks about future, looks royal, prasentable, has a clean and soft heart. she would be flexible and ready to travel to my country at any time, as my profession would be a lawyer and i want to practise in both country, she better have the pleasure to stay in a mix environment like Bangladesh and England, hope we will have fun.

He wants to be a lawyer yet he is not outgoing and doesn't like crowds? That's like me saying i want to be a child psychologist...but i don't like kids!


2)
IM A SIMPLE MAN AND AM LOKING FOR SIMPLE GIRL 4 ME, HU WILL LOVE ME, CARE ABOUT ME, I LOVE MY FAMILY ND I WANT SOMONE WHO WILL LOVE MY FAMILLY, IF ANYBODY SIRIUS ABOUT MERRIGE THEN THEY CAN CONTRAC ME NO WEASTIN TIME

Der's nuffink mre anoyin dan reciving a txt msg lyk dis! I cannot stand people who write like this. I'm not being all high and mighty but it really annoys me to see so many spelling and grammatical errors in one sentance...its partly down to my (very minor form of) OCD too.


3)
Im a british asain (Bengali) in this vigilant society, im a young entrepeneaur currently own two businesses so im working very hard to make something of myself one day, im a kind caring person, would go out of my way to please someone special, always laughing and joking, im slim build not that tall but tall enough, live in essex near lakeside. i don't really know what else to say about myself i think thats enough about me, lets talk about you! Lol

Again, another bachelor with with a lack of flare and education it seems. I have NOTHING against someone who does not have vast amounts of educational qualifications but darling if you're going to write 'vigilant society'  and 'entrepeneur', know the meaning and the context in which these words are to be used...certainly not applicable for a shaadi.com profile! He's 24 by the way and to be a young entrepeneur only signifies that he is probably a college dropout and taking care of his father's restaurants...not really Gordan Ramsey now are we?! And do you remember how our teachers would always give us prompts throughout exams about checking our work and reading over our work again and again and again...clearly this lad chose not to listen to his teachers!


4)
Hello My names *******......... I have joined this website to meet different women, for friendship and further if we get along well. So a bit about me.... Id like to think that im a very nice and kind person with a good sense of humour which goes a long way. I always like to enjoy my self as life is short and enjoy to the full, i go out with my friends on a regular basis as i dont have any family over here there the closest thing i have. Im not a person who likes staying in, im someone whos not scared trying different things and going on an adventure... you could say im a bit wild..... So if you like the sound of me then just request me. Chow Chow

Chow chow? My 2 year old nephew doesn't even say that when he leaves our house! and a bit wild? Reminds me of Alex Reid and his alter-ego (that woman he likes dressing up as). Oh gosh, if my parents ever married me off to someone like this i...i...i honestly don't know what i'd do. He wouldn't be home half the time anyway, he'd be out with his friends and enjoying life to the fullest as life is too short. Indeed it is...with someone like him!


5)
i am ****** *****. i have boned in bangladesh. i am simple, quite, gantle. i like to fun. i want same to me.Boned?

Oh gosh, doesn't sound too good does it?! There's nothing worse than a British born Bangladeshi girl marrying a guy like this, how would they communicate? Unless her Bengali was impeccable of course....oh and if she didn't mind a 'simple, quite, GANTLE' guy...sounds oh-so appealing doesn't he?!


6)
hi, im new to this so be gentle. im always working or im working out. Difficult to find someone. im looking for someone with looks aswell as a brain. i need to be able to talk to her when we are old. dont know what else to write, to find out more holla back

This guy sounds too busy to commit to marriage...sounds like he's married to work and the gym! He's obviously looking for a drop dead gorgeous model who has completed her degree, Masters and currently doing her PhD...from what i know, Bengali girls are generally under 5ft4 and not a lot of them go on to further their studies after graduating....sorry mate, good luck in finding that needle in the haystack though! I for one will not be ‘hollering’ at you anytime soon…


7)
i am very easy going person can able to cope with a hard situation, i am very caring and also very lovable person

Blaitently copied the 'cope with a hard situation' line from his CV! With a mere 1 line and 3 words, you're not doing yourself any justice mate. Bor-ring!


8)
Decent and Gentle! Neva done Clubbing, neva smoke, Neva drink !! Outgoing, Social and More Like Friendly ! Try to be honest and neva try to lie but sometimes it happens without any reason. I look young and people never believe me am 24 like. No one can guess my age, only my parents, friends and relatives know about it. I respect the family values and it is always important to me cause from a good and educated family can give a wise and educated nation which is good for our nation and culture. I am scared of allah and i belive holy quran and Mohammad (sm) Our prohet. But i can't prove it cause i don't pray 5 times which is more important. But i know one day it will happnen as i belive in allah and islam. Personally am very romantic and emotional. I would give my life anytime if someone realy loves me. In this age i learnt my responsibilities and ma parents and relative calls me matured person. I belive in reality most, dream can be true but its not wise to have luxarious dream. !! I got my limits and i got a future plan and i move forward according to this. I can make you laugh when your upset, i can calm you down if your hot temperd, when you are emotional i can wipe your tears. Im Looking for someone who realy cares, respect family values, honest and atleast scared of allah. Anyone welcome but all i want from you is love and you will get back more than you wanted i can assure you! Im not interested in arranged marraige, its kind of weird to me. I would like to know the person im going to marry in near future ! If you don't wanna have a relationship then you can be friend with me anytime!! You never know anyone can help you in any day. Last. No time wasters please!! Treat everyone with politeness, Even those who are rude to you..... Not because they are not nice, But bcoz u are nice.... !!! Goodluck Everyone !!

Hahahaha, this is funny...yet i feel to bring my violin out because i can tell he finds it diffcult expressing himself in words! My minor levels of OCD are exceeding it's limits with this one...


9)
hello, i\'m a muslim. I have black hair, dark brown eyes, I work in a restaurant as a waiter. i\'m fun to be with.................... and very attracting...

Oh dear, i can assure you ladies he wasn't 'attracting'. Black  hair, dark brown eyes...then he tells me he's a waiter at a restaurant. I'm a girl who is extermely passionate about all that i do, i have many aspirations and dreams i wish to pursue and to be with someone like this will kill all of that.


10)
wats good everyone? my names hassan, i was married before, i have 3kids 1 boi and 2 gyals, and i am on the search for my ideal Mrs who has to be about the age of 21 to 24, short and petite, has to be stunning that is a must, sexy body, sexy eyes, Bengali, funny some one that will make me laff, some one i can trust and relay on, some one that is lovable, and who is respectful and will get on with my family as i have a big family. Anyways back to me not bragging but i am a good looking guy, who has a fun and successful future planned ahead, so whoever the lucky girl is will have a fun and luxury life with me, i already have my own house which i am renting out currently, i also have 2 family businesses and have plans to open more in the future. People describe me as being down to earth and funny, that don't mean i cant be serious because i am at the right times, i don't let know one walk all over me or take me for a fool, so be aware no time wasters please, as you will get booed off!! Anyways in my spare time i enjoy going to the gym, going out with my mates, taking family out to eat, so don't worry about getting married and being bored at home, because my family are chilling and would not expect you to be stuck home, and i for sure would not allow that as i would be taking my Mrs out everywhere, bare holidays :). so that's a brief description about me, anyone that likes the sound of me and wants to know more then holla at me peace!!

This just screams BAGGAGEEE! Here we have our 'ghetto boy', the one that would salute his inlaws with 'wats good fam?' instead of salaam. There's nothing more annoying and sad than having to put up with a guy who talks to you like you're one of his boys for the rest of your life.


So there we have it ladies, this is the poole of the UK's most eligable Bangladeshi bachelors. Spoilt for choice won't you agree? From this, we have learnt:
a) That finding our soul mate may be harder than we think
b) There are a lot of BORING Bengali guys
c) If we don't end up with a boring, quiet or 'gantle' bengali guy...we'll probably end up with a wild rude boy with some baggage
d) I probably sound like a total cow for doing this post, but hand on heart it was for humour purposes only.


Who's your type then?


Ellister X

17 make-up haul...and a bit of Jessie Jizzle :)

Ola m'lovlies,

*que music*

Okay, firstly i thought i'd start off with some music from Jessie J. I was never really a big fan of hers after Do it like a dude but when i was watching an acoustic set she was doing for 4Music, i definitely saw her in an absolutely different light. She actually has a beautiful voice and her songs are those that you can definitely relate to. 'Who you are' was one of those songs i knew i can have on repeat and not get bored, i absolutely love it! What do you think? Thoughts on Jessie J?

Anyway, to my recent purchases...I went to see a friend yesterday and on my way home i decided to stop off at Boots. Obviously i marched up to the make up section first (as you do) and had a little browse through everything. My hand ended up like a child's hand (one that had found a stash of colouring pens and thought they were Banksy!) with all the make up testing and then my eyes drew to the 3 for 2 offer (naturally of course...hey i'm Asian!) at the 17 makeup section. I found a little space on my hand and tested some of the lip liners. I liked two of the colours (Valentine and Rose Blush) so i picked those up then my eyes drew to the blushers. Now i always have this thing about 'cheap' blushers, i  always think that they won't be good or in any way pigmented so i always avoid them. But i thought i'd give this particular one a try (China Pink).

So today my dear mother dragged me out of bed to go shopping, which meant i only had 5mins to do my make up and 5mins to get ready and do my hijab. I used the 17 blusher and surprisingly i really liked it. It gave me a natural looking pink colour to my cheeks and was pigmented enough. Compared to other blushers that i have which are mega pigmented and end up making me look like a clown and also tends to be kinda blotchy when applied, this was was pretty good. I think the original price was £3.49 which i think is pretty decent...compared to what i pay for some blushers from more 'high end' make up brands. So this will definitely be a keeper!

As for the lip liners, they were also good. One is a softer pink (Top; Rose blush- almost nude which a touch of pink) whilst the other (Valentine) is more pink but not a vibrant pink as such...excuse the lack of make up jargon, i'm not exactly a pro just a love for make up! You can use these as a base for your lipstick or wear it plain...if you wear it plain you can even add a bit of gloss if you wish!

Overall, i was happy with my purchases. Have you guys used any 17 products? Which are your fave...or least fave?

Hope you've enjoyed reading this post :)

Adios...

Ellister X

Reward and Celebration event at the Roundhouse- 23/03/2011

Hey guys,

I thought i'd do the first post of three events (bit of a mouthful!) i attended last week.

For three years i have been volunteering for eVolve; a youth action team for Central London that promotes and encourages young people aged 16-25 to volunteer. Unfortunately, we had received news this year that our funding will be cut so we will no longer be able to continue with our project. V Central London along with Volunteer Centre Westminster hosted an event for us and other volunteers to recognise our achievements. It was held at Camden's Roundhouse, a well known venue for celeb events and a venue associated with Amy Winehouse (why this ridiculous piece of information would interest you i have no idea but hey i thought i'd chuck it in!). Johnathon Ansell (1/4 of G4, a band who auditioned for X Factor a few years ago) hosted the night and i was among some lovely people; other volunteers, volunteer advisors i had met throughout volunteering for eVolve and a very talented beatboxer by the name of Hobbit.

I had a great night; food was nice, venue was amazing, got to meet uber-handsome Mr Ansell but overall being in the company of people who have achieved so much via volunteering topped the night! Here are some pics from the night...

 (Excuse the cross eyes and double chin...late night, wasn't feeling well and i had just eaten and my hijab decided to adjust itself to make me look like Avid Merion when he does Bo' Selecta...fellow hijabi's you feel me right?)

(I did however look like this when i left my house...honest!)

After spending near 2hours trying to upload the video of Hobbit, the ever-so-talented beatboxer, and it failing, i decided to give up and this may be my last post for the night :( However, if insomnia kicks in, i'll be back with another post :(

Toodles m'lovlies,

Ellister X

Product review: Hijab Fashion Shop

Hey chicas!!!...oh, i didn't consider my male followers? hmmm...chickens? Lol

Anyway, i recently placed an order from Hijab Fashion Shop after viewing some of their hijabs on their website. As soon as i saw them, i knew they were sold...to me! I love decorated hijabs and i especially love the flowery design...i don't care what season it is, i don't care if there is a monsoon outside or snow up to my knees, i'll still rock my loud and proud flowery hijabs, I LOVE THEM!

Anyway, i fell in love with almost all of the hijabs (from the 'latest stock' collection) and decided to by a couple. Of course a couple turned into three, then four, then five...and i resisted a sixth by purchasing two accessories for hijabs. Now i am watching the purse strings believe it or not and it all totalled up to around £38 including delivery. My thoughts on the price...well each scarf ranged from about £5-£6.50 i think and i do believe this was pulling on me purse strings a little as i usually buy my decorated/ flowery hijabs from Whitechaple (East London) which almost always have an offer of 3 hijabs for £5. But i consoled myself by comparing it to the value of a pair of jeans or a jacket and felt that it was justifiable (is there such word?!) to buy 5 hijabs (+ 2 accessories) than 1 jacket or a pair of jeans for £35-40, won't you agree fellow hijabis?

5 hijabs: far left is crinkly (i think i may iron it though), purple, light grey, dark grey and black...all with flowers :)

I received a couple of emails to say they had recieved my order and it was processing...and then dispatched...after like TWO DAYS! I must give it to them, delivery time could not be faulted! It came in a pretty pink package (i'm not keen on pink if you don't know already) and i couldn't believe my eyes...i tore it open like i would my doner kebab box, tearing away at it ferociously with my fingers first and when i was failing with that then i had to use the teeth (i wanted to use the little kid on Christmas metaphor but i know that's been rinced!), like i hadn't eaten for weeks or as if it was a competition with my siblings of who can open the kebab box the quickest and eat the most within 60 seconds...anyway, you catch my drift, i was desperate to see what these scarves looked like!!!

Hijab accessories

I was not at all disappointed. I loved each and every hijab...they even kindly included two hijab pins for free and i'm a sucker for freebies (hey i'm Asian, it's natural!).

Overall, very happy with my purchase and i will recommend this website to all you ladies.

Farewell darlings,

Ellister X

Blogpost marathon...starting NOW!

Hello,

'What? Hello? Is that it? She usually starts her posts with something pretty lively...' You guys probably thought that when you started reading this post, right? Well i hope so! There is a reason m'dears, Ellister has been stricken with a horrible chest infection/ bronchitis AND caught a nasty virus over the weekend! I shall tell you how it all began (because i know you guys are so eager to know about my oh-so-exciting life!).

Last Sunday i went to work with chest pain. I had it from the night before so i thought i'd sleep on it and see how i feel in the morning. However, i woke up and the pain was still there but funnily enough i still decided to go work (i like to stay loyal to my Sunday regulars!) thinking the pain may go away. When i got to work the pain got worse and although i didn't want the drama, i asked my team leader to call me an ambulance. Before i knew it i was yamming down 4 aspirins and connected through wires for an ECG. My heart was good but the paramedics insisted they take me to hospital for further check ups. When i got there, the doctor asked me a million questions and after gathering all the information and consulting with his senior, he said i had a chest infection/ bronchitis...I DON'T EVEN SMOKE! You shoulda seen the look on my mother's face though when he asked me if i smoke. Before i could answer she had already answered the question, 'Noooooo' she said before i could open my mouth to answer the question myself, and it was a long 'Nooooooo' to emphasise the fact that 'my daughter would never smoke you silly man, how dare you ask such a daft question?!'...don't you love an Asian parents protection towards their children?!

I eventually recovered from the chest infection but during the weekend i caught a horrible virus from a family member. It was like a scene out of Final Destination, it was only a matter of time until the next family member was hit with the virus; constant vomitting, high temperature, major headache and an 'upset tummy'. Indeed, i was one of them and it got me BAD! I haven't quite recovered fully yet but i'm much better than i was during the weekend.

I have therefore given myself a mission to go on a 'blogpost marathon' and see how many posts i can write until midnight tonight. It will be about random things, events i've been to recently, recent hauls, etc so i hope you guys enjoy it :)

Anyways, i've written enough and better save my energy for my next posts.

Adios amigos,

Ellister X

A fave outfit of mine...

Aloha peeps,

I apologise for neglecting my blog (and my lovely followers) for so long. I've been really busy doing  various things that i will eventually post about.

I was asked by Shamiya to do a post on fashion...i wouldn't go as far as calling myself a fashionista but i wore an outfit last week to an event which i liked...

Scarf: A stall in Whitechaple, East London
Red cardigan: Blanco, Westfield (London)
White top: I have so many so not sure where this one is from but HnM/ New Look/ Primark would do these
Chinos/ Peg-leg trousers (Is that what they are called?): Zara
Shoes (which unfortunately you cannot see were brown heels; your shoes should match your belt apparently!): New Look

So there you go, one of my fave outfits :) Its casual yet smart (for a more casual look i'd wear flats instead of heels and for more formal i'd go for a white shirt instead of red cardi and white top).

Toodle peep,

Ellister X